Snapshots at the 10-year mark

I love telling anyone - mums especially - that half of my parenting journey has been about learning from my children, as opposed to me teaching them stuff.

It's amazingly humbling how much I don't know and how much I've got it wrong.

My kids are a reflection of the best and worst in me. When I lose it on a bad day, it's not really about them - it's me confronting my own perfectionist streak and my insatiable desire for certainty, safety and significance, and not liking my reflection.

Right now, I'm battling my 10 yo who has decided she doesn't like piano and wants to give it up. Who thinks too much about sleepovers and parties and what her friends have that she hasn't got (DS, XBox, Kinect, and an endless assortment of iPhone apps that I refuse as a matter of principle to download). Who's bright and academically inclined, but also the most disorganized and ill-disciplined 10 yo I know. Who's volatile and bursting with pent-up injustices (real and imagined), jealous of the attention her little sister gets, and demands more time and one-on-one attention than I'm prepared to give.

I have what I think is a high-maintenance child on my hands.

I know I was pretty stubborn as a kid and I had many angsty moments as a teen, but I sure was never as much a handful as my firstborn is. At least I was a compliant child on the outside. She doesn't even pretend to comply.