What Does Death Mean?

Was quite perturbed to find after our latest library visit that Beth has borrowed not 1, but 3, books on the subject of death.

When Dinosaurs Die
Saying Goodbye To A Parent
Saying Goodbye To Daddy

When I asked her what prompted her to borrow them, she couldn't quite say.

What was worse is that she made me READ to her. I got a few pages into Saying Goodbye To A Parent and became so upset I couldn't continue.

Beth, in her usual confident and slightly impatient voice, said, "It's alright Mum. You can carry on reading."

That night, I showed the books to hubby and his response was: "Maybe she has a premonition." And went on to joke that he was going to "go first".


I read Saying Goodbye To Daddy and it totally freaked me out. Burst into sobs halfway. Hubby reassured me that God would take care of the family if anything happened to him.

Which is all good and fine when things are going well and you're feeling strong and confident. Not when you're suddenly hit by the horrible idea that things could just go very wrong any moment and you won't have one bit of say over when and how. All you can do is feel overwhelmed by a sick feeling and a sense that the world is closing in on you.

I just don't want to be tested that way, know what I mean?