Beth uses the H word

Yes, my precious, precocious 3.5-year-old finally did it.

One day, while she was in the midst of a huge tantrum because Mummy wouldn't let her do something, she screamed, "I HATE YOU!!!" with all the ferocity of a tiger cub.

Normally, I might have caved in and felt overwhelmed and vulnerable, but for some reason, I felt quite together that day and resisted all attempts to make me give way. It was a curious sensation, being there and yet feeling like an outsider looking contemplatively at me responding to the assault. It was the age-old battle of the wills.

In the end, Beth surrendered, flags flying, and made up quite quickly with hugs and tears. She even managed an "I love you Mummy" after the storm had blown over, to which I teasingly replied, "Didn't you say you hate Mummy?"

There is much to be said for not sparing the rod.

I hope Beth has learnt that she cannot always get her own way, and more importantly that she will not get it by emotional blackmail. Having endured a traumatic childhood and adolescence at the hands of an emotionally erratic parent, I understand more than most how critical it is not to let the cycle (or generational curse) repeat itself.